Grrrrr...frust nya.

Mikey, I think I should heed your advice and go for the 'counseling advisor' position.

How did I get into this mess? Next time I ask a guy 'how are you' and their answer is not good because they are having girl problem...knock me on the head and remind to just say 'I'm sorry but I can't talk now'. Yeah, I could just have exit MSN and just go do something else. But no, I had to feel bad for them and try to console them. How can I walk away when a friend so dear is in such a heartbreak? How can I not try to cheer them up? It breaks my heart when they look so upset although at the same time, they are hurting me.

Three months ago I was consoling JJ when he had a fight with his gal...even though he hid the truth from me for almost a year, making me think he was really gonna accept State and that he's coming alone. (no worries JJ..you're still my buddy..or is there a reason I should not forgive ya?? *wink* ) Then the past weekend, it was BK who's breaking my heart. This time it's for two reason. One - he's so upset and I hate to see him that way. Second - he's fallen in love again. Not surprising. But this time, he's falling hard. So here I am on a roller-coaster ride again. Happy for him 'coz he's found the girl he wants, sad for him 'coz it's not all peachy, and sad for myself 'coz it's like losing him again. On the other side, all of you who have been on my side would be proud to know that I was being good. No tantrums. No sarcastic remark. Did my best to console him and with all my respect, I kept my words separated from my emotions and no accusations. (:P I know I'm praising myself here but hei, it's a victory for me). It's hard but I'm crawling through. With all my heart, I wish him best of luck to getting LS back and that happiness and true love be with them always. As for you JJ, you gotta keep that promise of yours when she comes over...she's doing it for you so I hope you'll make it worth it for her. Way to go guyz!!

That's enough heart breaks to last me a lifetime. No more getting myself into such murky puddles. They gotta deal with whatever comes next. It's too risky...came this far and yet a small slip will make me drown in the sorrow again. Isn't this frustrating? Just when I thought I'm all fine, that I'm totally over all that had happen, I'm back up on the roller coaster ride. Blah!